Greetings and Salutations of the day.
I have written a couple of you about my unbelievable good luck in the recent month.
Yes dear friends, hear me out. I have won without, with any stretching of the truth, well over
10,000,000 dollars sterling just in the last month. It is all being held for me by differnt institutions that believe it or don't do not want my bank acct number or SS.
All they want is a certified check made out to them for various amounts for their holding and insuring my winnings. Usually it is between 240.00 and 500.00 American.
What a deal.
Now before all of you go how can this be? I will tell you. I just seem to be drawing the winning numbers in Lotteries benched out of the US proper.
Now anyone wishing to cash in on my good luck I would be williing to take only twice the amount that is required for me to collect. Fair enough don't you think. I mean, nothing is entirely free.
On another note, I have found out what is wrong with some of my e mails. My mind and eyes work faster than my fingers so sometimes I see the completion of a sentence that is not really there. I must admit thou, there are times when the reverse happens and my fingers outrun my mind. This is a rare occurance. I apologize for any misspellings, lost sentences, or paragraphs. Perhaps this is why I was never accepted for the Naval Adacamy, Yale University and the list goes on and on. I have never given up hope thou and daily trudge out to the postbox with high hopes.
Realizing now, I don't need such honors to paste on my wall with my good luck spree, my daily inspections of the mail box comes later and later. In fact, yesterday when I was supposed to let the neighbors dogs in as they are on vacation, the checkout never happened and the dogs, one of which is 3/4 serious, tried to jump thru the winodw and totally ripped out the screen. Now do you all think I should own up to this or make up a story about the dogs took off on a run and I got tired of waiting for them to return and went to bed, or should I tell the truth. You input plus your cash will be greatly appreciated
Sincerly
McFlap McWaiting
It's All Too Good Man!
Monday, October 13, 2008
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8 comments:
Even I must correct a devestating error. The neighgors dog is 3/4 WOLF and stands about 4 feet tall one all 4. Correction Done
Peace Out
Mudflap McStrange
Send me a check for $500 and I'll come up with a fabulous story for the neighbors!
Last month we went out of town and had our neighbor feed our dogs... this neighbor is scared of dogs, and after what he went through, I believe dogs can sense our fears. It didn't go well, they pinned him inside our garage one night and it was pitch black in there, he had to try and find a light. Poor guy.
I can't believe I told you to buy some fur lined boots with your $96.00, especially since you won $10,000,000 in the last month. If you're feeling generous, I know a great cause you could donate to, it's called "Lindsey needs some Ugg's".
Tristan and sending you a check for 500.00. With all my winnings I don't think I will give a damn about my neighbors. I am going to build a castle on our spot of ground with a moat. Now about investing in me and MY getting of funds...........
Lindsey, you are absolutely correct about an animals ability to sense or smell fear. Humans can do this also. Scat back to the animals and the sad tail of your neighbor. Yes I know how to spell tale. You are lucky that when you returned he wasn't in the very same position holding dogs at bay either with a fatal coranary or just luck was on his side. This happens. I can just picture it.
You see I went to Medical Assistant School and then proceeded on to work as a tech at All Pets which is no longer. There wasn't an animal that came in that I could not work with. But some of the vets and some techs were always covered with bite marks and claw marks. I believe my girlfriend would have been taken down by a mountain lion that followed her down a canyon that I had left her at the top of on my motorcycle. She put her fear away and replaced it with prayer and love of God. When I picked her up all the fear came out in tears. Scary stuff. With me It has always been that way except for the moose that I wrote about in an earlier blog. Differnt story. Differnt wave length.
Mudflap Mcfearless
Lindsey, PS, about the new boots.
Well me being mostly vegitarian I will have to take man made insulation. But first I need some takers on my offer of sending me double the amount the institutions need (fair) and we will all have new boots and new neighbors.
Have a great day
Mudflap
Hey I just heard you are supposed to say "rabbit,rabbit,rabbit" on the first day of every month for optimal good luck. I have no idea...
Good grief Pansyfan, what a revalation. Now I won't even take my axe with me walking. Thanks for the info. If you don't ever hear from me again, possibly rabbit wasn't the correct thing to say.
Rapid
Tristan, Checks' in the mail, the dog don't bite and that is as far as I am ever going to go with the three greatest lies.
Mudflap McStory
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